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Sweet Style

In "sweet" style, the earlier memo might look like the following passage:

Hey, guess what time of year it is, guys? It's vehicle registration time again. August 1 thru August 20--three big weeks--have been set aside just for you to do that. Isn't that wonderful? If your wheels are on campus, they gotta have a new sticker. (This means you too, ladies.) This little sticker is good thru August 15, 2008.

And we'll only be charging you fifty bucks again this year--no increase. If you can't pick up your sticker in person, send your better-halves to do it for you. Just remember to have your registration plate number and a valid driver's license (Isn't it just awful what you have to go through just to park your buggy?)

All you turkeys with unpaid tickets for doing no-no's won't be allowed to register until you take care of 'em. But you better register those cars. Otherwise, a man with a big truck will haul your buggy away. (Bye bye!) Then it'll cost you a cool two hundred to get it back.

Now hurry on down and get this done, you hear? The gals at the traffic office don't want you all piling in on them all at once. We're open every day of theweek from 8 to 4 and take an hour for lunch. (It's really two hours, but you already knew that.) So come on over--we can't wait to see you.

If you compare the memo with the original, you can see the difference in formality, diction, contractions, and whatnot.

A registration fee of fifty dollars ($50) will be required for each motor vehicle registered with the college. The individual faculty or staff member, or his/her spouse, must come by the traffic office to register the motor vehicle. Registration plate number and a valid operator's license must be provided for the registration process.

A faculty or staff member with delinquent assessments for parking violations will not be permitted to register a motor vehicle until all assessments are paid. Failure to register a motor vehicle that utilizes college property, owned or leased, for parking privileges will subject the vehicle to immediate towing.

Prompt registration is encouraged in order to prevent unnecessary delays by registering at the last minute. This office is open Monday through Friday, 8:00 a.m. to 11:45 p.m. and 1:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m.

What does this memo look like in a (1) plain and personal style, (2) stuffy style or (3) sweet style?

Back to style page.

 

 
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